Pookie
01-25-2008, 11:19 AM
Ok, everyone else has an agenda. Here's mine:
1. All dogs except those who are particularly kind and tolerant to cats are to be housed in internment camps for re-education.
2. All cats will enjoy liberties such as universal vet care, heated litterboxes, and restaurant-grade fresh seafood, and other provisions as designated by law.
3. Any and all fleas, worms, and parasites harmful to cats will be systematically exterminated and wiped off the planet.
4. Roadside seafood buffets will be constructed every five miles on major roads and highways. Dogs who show promise in re-education will be given jobs at these roadside establishments.
5. All cats in proving their loyalty to the Feline Agenda Party will catch, kill, and eat no fewer than 30 rodents per month, thereby bringing down the rodent population and combatting climate issues coming from rodent farts.
6. The death penalty will be automatic for any creature who tries to harm a cat. Lawyers will not be provided.
7. All cats who are running for office will have to fight for their position. Whoever is left standing wins.
8. Forced spaying and neutering will be illegal.
9. Rottweilers, pit bulls, Dobermans, and any other so-called dangerous dogs will be given special treatment while in re-education such as steaks, lots of love, toys, warm beds and heated, comfortable shelters so that the humans will finally understand that dogs aren't mean, people are.
10. Anyone who is against the FAP will be charged with treason and sent to Gitmo.
And that's just the beginning! Welcome to the 21st century, people. The times they are a-changin'.
Purrs,
President Pookie
1. All dogs except those who are particularly kind and tolerant to cats are to be housed in internment camps for re-education.
2. All cats will enjoy liberties such as universal vet care, heated litterboxes, and restaurant-grade fresh seafood, and other provisions as designated by law.
3. Any and all fleas, worms, and parasites harmful to cats will be systematically exterminated and wiped off the planet.
4. Roadside seafood buffets will be constructed every five miles on major roads and highways. Dogs who show promise in re-education will be given jobs at these roadside establishments.
5. All cats in proving their loyalty to the Feline Agenda Party will catch, kill, and eat no fewer than 30 rodents per month, thereby bringing down the rodent population and combatting climate issues coming from rodent farts.
6. The death penalty will be automatic for any creature who tries to harm a cat. Lawyers will not be provided.
7. All cats who are running for office will have to fight for their position. Whoever is left standing wins.
8. Forced spaying and neutering will be illegal.
9. Rottweilers, pit bulls, Dobermans, and any other so-called dangerous dogs will be given special treatment while in re-education such as steaks, lots of love, toys, warm beds and heated, comfortable shelters so that the humans will finally understand that dogs aren't mean, people are.
10. Anyone who is against the FAP will be charged with treason and sent to Gitmo.
And that's just the beginning! Welcome to the 21st century, people. The times they are a-changin'.
Purrs,
President Pookie