How to become a lib

[Stoner]

Virtually anyone can become a liberal. Here are the prerequisites:

1. You must believe the AIDS virus is spread by a lack of federal funding.

2. You must believe the same teacher who cannot teach 4th graders to read is somehow qualified to teach them about sex.

3. You must believe that guns in the hands of law-abiding Americans are more of a threat than nuclear weapons in the hands of Chinese Communists.

4. You must believe there was no art before Federal funding.

5. You must believe global temperatures are less affected by cyclical, documented changes in the earth's climate, and more affected by SUVs.

6. You must believe gender roles are artificial, but homosexuality is natural.

7. You must be against capital punishment, but in favor of abortion on demand.

8. You must believe business creates oppression and the government creates prosperity.

9. You must believe self-esteem is more important than actually doing something to earn it.

10. You must believe the military, not politicians, start wars where military personnel, not politicians, die.

11. You must believe the NRA is bad because it supports certain parts of the Constitution, while the ACLU is good because it supports certain parts of the Constitution

12. You must believe taxes are too low, but ATM fees are too high.

13. You must believe standardized tests are racist, but racial quotas and set-asides aren't.

14. You must believe Hillary Clinton is a lady.

15. You must believe the only reason socialism hasn't worked anywhere it's been tried is because the right people haven't been in charge.

16. You must believe homosexual parades are Constitutionally protected, but manger displays at Christmas are illegal.

[Scorpion]

Hmmm. Funny in sort of a lame way. I always wondered what conservatives did with their free time, that is besides going to behavioral health therapy.

[NortheastCynic]

#12 is actually very funny.

-NC

[lawless168]

LMAO

@ 16 ... so true

[Stoner]

Lib philosophies are whacked. Always have been always will be. No one should be surprised they've been bitch-slapped in the presidential elections 20 out of the past 28 years.

And what did they do with the 8 years that they actually held the White House? They watched as their "savior" made a laughing stock of the administration and got himself impeached, becoming only the second president in the history of our country to do so.

[PatrickHenry]

Nice plagiarism BTW, Stoner.

[Scorpion]

Lib philosophies are whacked. Always have been always will be. No one should be surprised they've been bitch-slapped in the presidential elections 20 out of the past 28 years.

And what did they do with the 8 years that they actually held the White House? They watched as their "savior" made a laughing stock of the administration and got himself impeached, becoming only the second president in the history of our country to do so.


Perhaps you have forgotten about a noteworthy conservative Republican, "Tricky Dick" Nixon. He would have been impeached but he had the good sense to resign.

[Stoner]

He would have been impeached

Ah, the "would have, could have, should have" argument. Those are always funny.

If I would have been 6'8" and had a wicked jump shot I could have been the starting forward for the Orlando Magic this year.

[Scorpion]

He would have been impeached

Ah, the "would have, could have, should have" argument. Those are always funny.

If I would have been 6'8" and had a wicked jump shot I could have been the starting forward for the Orlando Magic this year.


Check this out and tell me if you're still laughing: http://www.watergate.info/impeachment/impeachment-articles.shtml

[Stoner]

Check this out and tell me if you're still laughing:

And if I could throw a 103 mph fasball I would be the starting pitcher for the Yankees.

Still playing, "Would/should/could have" games?

Only 2 Presidents have been impeached. Neither of whom is Nixon.

[Scorpion]

Check this out and tell me if you're still laughing:

And if I could throw a 103 mph fasball I would be the starting pitcher for the Yankees.

Still playing, "Would/should/could have" games?

Only 2 Presidents have been impeached. Neither of whom is Nixon.


I'm not playing a "game," but merely trying to illuminate you in the fact that Republicans have had their problems as well as Democrats. It's your choice to accept or reject the truth.

The articles of impeachment against Nixon were prepared and the House was in the preliminary stage of impeachment proceedings when Nixon resigned. Had he not resigned by all accounts, and given the profound gravity of the charges, he would have been impeached.

And best of luck with your career in pro sports.

[Stoner]

Again, all Scorpion is doing is playing the "what if" game. I care more about facts and the fact is this...only 2 presidents have been impeached. One is Bill Clinton and the other is not Nixon.

No one cares about "what if." Thanks for playing. Drive home safely.

[Alonzo]

So, basically, Clinton is worse than Nixon because Nixon realized he was gonna be kicked out while Clinton realized that there wasn't a chance in hell that he'd be removed from office.

The actual behavior they engaged in has no place in this discussion.

Personally, and maybe this is just me, but when someone, let alone the president, is knowingly tape recording themselves engaging in illegal activity, there's a serious problem.

It would be like me sitting in the office and a friend comes in "Hey, everything all set"

Me: HOLD IT! Gotta set up the tape first!

Me: Ok, so did you pick out which liquor store we're gonna rob first?

[Scorpion]

Again, all Scorpion is doing is playing the "what if" game. I care more about facts and the fact is this...only 2 presidents have been impeached. One is Bill Clinton and the other is not Nixon.

No one cares about "what if." Thanks for playing. Drive home safely.


Well Stoner, if what they say is true, "Ignorance is bliss," then you must be a very happy person.

The fact is that had Nixon stayed in office, he would have been impeached. Even though he was a Republican he had enough sense to know what was coming and he resigned.

[Stoner]

Ok, ok, I want to play. What if...an elepheant had wing? Could it fly? It's easy to at first say no but what if they were super-wings? What if they were 50 feet long? Would it be possible?

[Buck Laser]

Check this out and tell me if you're still laughing:

And if I could throw a 103 mph fasball I would be the starting pitcher for the Yankees.

Still playing, "Would/should/could have" games?

Only 2 Presidents have been impeached. Neither of whom is Nixon.

And only one president has ever resigned. Of course, he had a promise of a pardon from his successor. Real bright, Stoner.

[ECW]

Well Stoner, if what they say is true, "Ignorance is bliss," then you must be a very happy person.

Now THAT was funny.

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