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View Full Version : Dickipedia: John McCain


Kyi Yo
04-15-2008, 08:23 AM
This is hilarious, sad, but hilarious.

http://dickipedia.org/dick.php?title=John_McCain

I loved this part, shows how truly scary this guy is.

An "asshole" senator

Far from actually being a "maverick," the one word that would accurately describe his time in public life is: "asshole." That McCain was able to successfully make himself be thought of as a "maverick" says as much about the press as it does about McCain. That is, one cannot understand how McCain did this without also understanding the delicate psychology of the Washington D. C. press corps.

Most Washington journalists have a deeply internalized sense of self-loathing. They see themselves as cowardly, flaccid, ineffectual, impotent wimps. In this, they're not entirely wrong. They have always secretly admired the asshole jocks who used to push them around in high school. The journalists would console themselves with the soothing affirmation that the assholes were not as smart as they were. They were right, of course, but still, deep down the journalists secretly admired the assholes.

Along comes John McCain -- an asshole, but an asshole who is nice to them, an asshole who comes to back of the plane and jokes around with them and doesn't make them feel unmanly. Why, sometimes, it seemed as if McCain really liked them. A few years of this, and suddenly McCain's not a temperamental, dangerously unstable asshole, he's a "maverick."

But the self-esteem issues of the weakling press notwithstanding, McCain is, in fact, an asshole. An asshole who wants to be the President of the United States. As an asshole senator, he the sort of guy who says things like:

• "Only an asshole would put a budget together like this!" (to New Mexico Republican Pete Dominici)

• "I'm calling you a fucking jerk!" (to Iowa Republican Senator Chuck Grassley)

• "Fuck you. I know more about this than anybody in the room." (To Texas Republican Senator John Cornyn)

This is why Senator Dominici said in 2000 that "I decided I didn't want this guy anywhere near a trigger." It is presumed by this he meant the nuclear trigger.

McCain is also the sort of guy who would tell the following joke:

Q: Why is Chelsea Clinton so ugly?

A: Her father is Janet Reno.

This is the sort of humor assholes find funny. When he told the joke, Chelsea Clinton was seventeen years old. <snip>

In speaking about whether he had ever witnessed McCain's notorious temper problem, former Pennsylvania Republican Senator Rick Santorum said, "I don't know anybody in the Senate who hasn't. Everybody has their McCain story."

And if America elects this temperamental, dangerously unstable, angry old asshole, America will have its own McCain story too.

micfranklin
04-15-2008, 01:13 PM
Dickipedia: wow, real original name

Moorington
04-15-2008, 01:19 PM
If acting and sounding like a regular American gets politicians the title of 'asshole' I think I want a bunch of assholes running my country- *gasp* he used the f-word!!!

ECW
04-15-2008, 03:48 PM
If acting and sounding like a regular American gets politicians the title of 'asshole' I think I want a bunch of assholes running my country- *gasp* he used the f-word!!!

Nah. Seven years of having an asshole run our country into the ground should be enough for anyone except the truly masochistic among us. Count me out for a Bush third term.